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She came in today, the first time in a while.
She didn't want to take a bath.
She hadn't slept since Monday.
She just wanted to sleep.
Please.
Sad eyes.
So dirty little girl.

She said there were so many men in her house.
She was scared to fall asleep cause they might come to her.
She was unprotected.
She said, "He hurt me."
Please.
Sad eyes.
So broken little girl.

She said, "He hurt me."
She ran, torn open.
She came to us and all we could do was hold her.
She slept for hours.
Please.
Sad eyes.
So desperate little girl.

She has little cuts all over her wrist.
She tries to drain the pain.
She needs hope.
She's thirteen.
Please.
Sad eyes.
So little girl.

Once again...

...I have no words to explain what my life is like. I find my thoughts jumbling through my head and rolling around, but they aren't really forming into sentences that I can speak, let alone communicate in writing. But that is no reason not to try. So here are a few thoughts.

we're at the beginning of our second week. in the first week we mostly were amazed at how much we didn't know that we didn't know. but now we are fully aware of how utterly dependent we are on GOD. we're open from 10-3 for the first month. we'll evaluate after one month and see if we need to adjust our times and length of being open. this is such an incredibly challenging ministry, we need to go slowly and build relationship with the kids.

the kids coming to the center:

30 kids, so far. only 5 are girls. age range 6-22 (we are aiming at a cut-off of 18 years old...we'll see what happens.:))

a 12 yr old girl and a 13 yr old girl, both prostitutes. one of them is cutting herself to let the pain leak out of her body instead of being trapped inside.

a 7 year old boy, covered literally head to toe in scabies. last Friday he showed up with a terrible dog bite on his ankle. he had been sleeping in the street and a dog broke away from the owner and charged the group of street kids. the others ran away, but this little boy was asleep and the dog bit through to the bone.

a 20 year old boy, addicted to sniffing glue, still acts like a 12 year old.

a 6 year old boy, some scabies, sleeps on the street is the one all the kids pick on all day. punching, kicking, slapping, standing on his neck. of course we prevent this happening in the center, but Teresa observed this kind of treatment the other day outside the mall.

a 16 year old girl, former prostitute, we're unclear on what she's doing now.

and that's only a few of them.

most of the boys have been the victim of sexual assault from men who pay with a bottle of coke, or maybe a meal. some of the men are foreigners. others are locals.

most of the boys are addicted to rugby, a glue...they carry small amounts around in plastic bags and cover their noses with the bag, inhaling the fumes and gaining relief of the persistent hunger and terror of life on the street.

almost all of the kids who have been coming to the center are members of the Bloods, a gang. their leader is one of the ones coming and he is so very respectful of us. it's incredible.

All of this is what I am seeing everyday. We're learning all day long everyday about what life is REALLY like here in Butuan. It's just not pretty.

Have you read Romans 8 recently?

"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the LOVE OF GOD that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

How can it be that that verse fits in the same post as the list I have just shared? How can both things be true?? NOTHING can separate us from the love of God?? God loves those kids? The ones that as I type are sleeping on the street? Or being sexually assaulted? Or beat up? Or sniffing glue?? REALLY???

reaLLY???

really.

Day 4

Here's what Teresa had to say on Thursday nite:

What a mind-blowing, astounding first few days. I’m absolutely numb as I sit here and type. I’m still processing all the events of the past few days. My heart breaks for the despair and longing I see in their eyes. Today was the 4th day…we had 26 children today. They were so happy to take baths and wash their clothes. We had our first girls today, they are 13 and 14 years old. All the kids are just so adorable. They range from 5 to 20 years old. We have come to realize that all the children who are coming are part of the same gang. Today they were drawing pictures with their gang sign and Project Destiny together….so we are now one big family with the gang. So far they are really so respectful and thankful. We are focused this first month on just relationship with them and gaining their trust. We spend the morning with baths and washing clothes, then we eat and wash plates, then we play, draw, and sleep. The children come at 10:00 a.m. and leave at 3:00 p.m. Next month we will add in worship and Bible stories. For now they love being loved and hugged. Our staff is just the best. Today we had 2 staff and 2 staff in-training. We really need more staff...like tomorrow. We will start training next week. We will train at least 8 new people 4-7 p.m. We are continuing to have feeding outreaches to children still in the streets 4-5p.m. Today we canceled the outreach due to rain...it's been raining a full 30 hours!!! In fact when the kids arrived this morning they we soaked from head to foot and inside out.

Today was the first day that the kids washed their own clothes. They were so cute! One of the older boys was too funny...he brought a whole bag of torn up clothes to wash. We realized we really need to buy a washing machine to help out. We want the kids to learn responsibility by washing their own clothes but we want to help them out by spinning the clothes so that they will dry by the next day. When we took the clothes home tonight, we discovered that they were still so smelly and decided to re-wash them. The water was completely BLACK with dirt as the washer cleaned away. Now our house looks like a village of street children exploded all over our walls! Their clothes are hanging in almost every room with fans blowing to try to dry them. We're praying God's anointing will soak into those clothes as the dry here

Well, sorry for the ramblings today...here are a few things to pray for....(thanks)

Please pray for:

• More staff
• Wisdom and discernment for us all
• That we all hear God’s voice moment by moment in all situations big and small
• Safety, protection, and provision for the street kids
• Teachable spirits for the kids
  
• They really see and feel God’s love through us for them
• Provision for our monthly budget for the center